So I have a blog now. That's new. Speaking as someone who has always despised the word blog, indeed, the very sound of the word, I did not envision myself ever joining blogspot. But then I remembered goal 1a, subclause 5:

In order to conquer the world, one must first have a thronging mass, eager to devour every syllable one utters.

So I decided to start uttering things, hence this entry. I plan to start somewhat unintelligibly, fumbling for an audience, not unlike a teenager eager to share his protuberance with a woman, if only he could find one, and unclasp that damn bra clasp! Curse you Bra clasp!

Anyhoo, the prime purpose of this blog is to get my writing chops up, so as to facilitate any number of my side-endeavors. Comedy is hard work, and I'm currently not scheduled for promotion. I wish to change this status. If you are reading this, eager to learn my innermost thoughts and secrets, which desperate housewife I identify with/would most like to bang, prepare for disappointment. Because I don't watch that show.

But I can say, without question, that the answer is Terri Hatcher.

If you are reading this, with the intention of reading some funny screeds, or links to some crazy, or dare I suggest, funny shit, then you very well might be in luck.