The Eternal Debate

Since it’s birth, its very nature has been mired in debate. Fathers have turned against sons, friends have become foes, entire nations have been torn asunder in a quest to answer the following question.

The hot dog. Is it a sandwich?

First, we must ask. What is a sandwich? It is, at its core, a filling which usually contains meat, flanked at both sides by a piece of bread. For this reason, I believe the question boils down to a small section of bread connecting both sides of the bun. I call this the “Gaza strip”.


This strip of bread makes the whole hot dog bun a single contiguous piece of bread, rather than two separate ones. This is the crux of the problem. However, I believe that this does not prevent the hot dog from being a sandwich.

Those that believe the hot dog is not a sandwich will say “Well what about the Taco then? Is the Taco a sandwich?” No, because a taco is generally made with a corn tortilla. That ain’t bread sir. What about a quesadilla? Yes, as it is generally made with a flour tortilla, the quesadilla is technically a sandwich, and I’m curious why you keep bringing up Mexican food. When did this become a racial thing? The Pita Pocket? I submit to you that this is also a sandwich.

This question must be answered for the sake of future generations. If it is left to languish, someone who believes one way or another is going to get nukes, and that will be bad times.